Hey Mums and Dads - how are you sleeping? Here's some things you need to know

When was the last time you had a good night sleep? I mean a REAL, good, night sleep? A night without any interruptions? A night without any cries? No nappy changes? No wet beds? No sleep walking? No missing dummies? No kids falling out of beds?

I remember the day I became a parent. My first night sleep was awesome! Seriously.

Mary and I had just been through one of the most beautiful moments anybody can ever have - the birth of our first child. For months, leading up to the birth, sleeping was becoming increasingly difficult because it was getting harder for Mary to get comfortable. The baby inside of her just kept getting bigger. It had been a long pregnancy with lots of waiting, pain, and discomfort - and after 9 months Mary was ready to get that baby out! The due date came and went, and when after 2 weeks later we had no baby, the hospital decided to hurry things along. The induction process however, still took another 3 days. We were admitted to the hospital and spent the final three days just walking, talking, trying to get comfortable, and trying to somehow find a way to rest.

Mary was exhausted.

Finally the moment arrived and our son James was born at 2am on the 18th July. After a few hours of measuring and checkups, Mary was sent to the maternity ward for a well earned rest. After 9 months of discomfort - she would finally get a chance to sleep.

So I went home and did the same. I think I slept for at least 8 hours. Heck - I had earned it!

But it was only when I got back to the hospital and saw Mary’s face, that I realised her “good night’s sleep” had lasted only 30 minutes.

There are 2 similarities between Children and Terrorists:

1. they do not negotiate, and
2. they use sleep deprivation as torture.

There are hundreds of reasons why parents are sleep deprived - but they all stem from the same source - responsibility. Not only do parents have a responsibility to tend to the physical needs of their children during the night, but they also start to stretch and grow their own personal capacity so that they can help their kids be the best they can be.

Parents have a lot to do, and since time is a limited resource, sleep ends up being sacrificed on the altar of productivity. Time waits for nobody.

I remember a time when I was single and at university. I was talking to a mentor friend of mine, Eddy, who was keeping me accountable to some of the goals I had told him I wanted to fulfill. In frustration I blurted out to him that “I just don’t have enough time!” Eddy paused - looked at me - and exploded with laughter! Anybody else would have thought I was Jimmy Fallon and Will Ferrell wearing tight pants. Eddy was laughing pretty hard, but eventually he managed to spit out the words, “Jamie - you have no idea.”

This Blog post is dedicated to all those Parents out there who dream for a bigger and better future for their kids. This goes out to the heroes who, after feeding, washing, and putting their kids to sleep, will burn the midnight oil to get the job done - and then get up three times during their 5 hour nap to tend to their crying kids. This is for the parents who know that R.E.M. is literally a dream. But the song “Everybody Hurts” is not.

Mums and Dads, everywhere, I salute you - and everytime I talk to a parent like you chasing their dreams - I am inspired and motivated to do the same.

However, my message to all you Mums and Dads out there is that we need to remember the old adage of the Tortoise and the Hare.

We all know the story of the race between the Tortoise and the Hare, and how the Hare - being far quicker than the Tortoise - stopped to take a rest halfway through the race and fell asleep. The Tortoise kept plodding along, eventually overtaking the Hare, and ultimately beat it to the finish line.

The problem with the Hare was not so much the fact he fell asleep, but that he went too hard, too fast. Whenever we do that as parents we may temporarily get ahead of our schedule - but exhaustion soon overcomes us - and we are forced to rest through sickness or injury.

I have set some goals for myself this year, and one of the key goals is to go to bed at bedtime. It might sound childish but this has been an amazingly effective Productivity Hack. By recognising that sleep is crucial to being effective in other areas of my life, I have had to think hard and make even harder choices about what to do with my time.

So, gone are the nights of stuffing around on social media, gone are the nights where I feverishly throw an all nighter to reach a last minute deadline, gone are the nights where I will sit in front of my laptop - falling asleep - taking 3 hours to do something that would have taken me only 30 minutes to do in the morning.

In order to get the job done I have switched from having late nights to doing early mornings. Most nights I still get up a few times to tend to the kids, but I am feeling way more refreshed, a lot more productive, and have been heaps more happier.

I have realised that even though late nights make you feel like you are getting more done, inconsistency and exhaustion will always take over and make you stop. So I have decided to be like the Tortoise and be more consistent. I just keep plodding along, getting to bed on time, getting up early, and getting the job done.

How much sleep are you getting?